Should we have a first look? This is one of the most commonly asked questions from my couples. I used to encourage couples to not have a first look. I thought it would rob them of an incredibly special, once in a lifetime moment. It’s the moment thats glamorized in movies. That first glimpse of each other on your wedding day while you’re surrounded by loved ones. If this is something you dream about, you should absolutely skip the first look and enjoy this traditional experience. That being said, this is where the benefits of skipping a first look end.
While it’s still incredible to see each other for the first time during the processional, it’s not the only way to get those butterflies on your wedding day.
Hold on – What Even is a First Look?
If you don’t know what exactly a first look is, you’re not alone. These things aren’t always intuitive, especially as trends come and go in the wedding industry. A first look is simply a chunk of time carved out for you and your partner to see each other prior to the ceremony. Typically one person is staged (hello beautiful light/scenery), and the other walks up behind them and instructs them to turn around. You’ll get to see each other in a private setting and have it documented by your photographer. Your photographer should be very much out of the way and quiet during this time. It gives you space to breathe during an incredibly emotionally taxing day.
Why I Love a First Look (and you will too)
There are so many reasons to love a first look. What I know to be true is couples find this moment just as monumental as the walk down the aisle. Dare I say, sometimes it feels even more intimate and exciting? Imagine still having this moment of your partner seeing you for the first time, but you can actually take your time soaking it in. You can talk to each other, hold each other, and get completely lost in the moment together.
First Looks Will Absolutely Calm You down
This is my very favorite justification for a first look. For the person that is anxious about the day and feeling all the nerves and feelings, you will benefit immensely from a first look. Seeing your partner and being able to breathe together, talk with each other, feel those emotions in a private space, this is what will allow you to relax a bit. I promise you will still feel emotional and in awe as you watch your partner walk own the aisle towards you. It does not take away the excitement of that moment, just the anticipatory nerves.
First Looks Allow for An Efficient Timeline
As someone who aims for a comfortable and joyful experience for my couples, I never want your wedding to feel like a photoshoot. That is the opposite of what we are aiming for. Even still, you will want your day to flow seamlessly and efficiently. Having a first look opens up the pre ceremony time to wedding party and family photos. These can sometimes feel like more of a chore, if you’re wanting to be involved in your cocktail hour/reception. Getting these finished before the ceremony (and before your guests begin drinking) is a huge help to your timeline. You’ll feel really grateful these have already been taken care of when your cocktail hour starts and you and your family are drinking and mingling with your guests.
Family Photos Will Feel Like a Breeze
If you’ve ever been to a family members wedding, you can likely admit family photos are not necessarily the highlight of the day. I am proud to say I have a strategy in place for making them painless. While this is really nice for my couples, there can still be pain points for family photos. One of them being the timing. If you do not have a first look, you will need to take your family photos during your cocktail hour.
Guests are AMPED right after the ceremony. They’re excited to offer congratulations to each other and they’re headed straight to the bar. It is a lot harder to gather everyone for family photos where they have to patiently wait for their turn with the couple and they’d rather be off celebrating. It makes a lot more sense to let this time be for festivity and mingling rather than structured photos.
The best time for formal family portraits is pre ceremony. You can give your family members an exact arrival time and be ready to knock these photos out. Everyone is paying attention and ready to go. They are there for a single purpose and understand what’s expected of them. They really do go smoothly and quickly.
It’s also worth noting, if you are not set on having formal family photos you can absolutely skip this altogether. Just give me a list of important people and I’ll snag a photo of you and your partner with them at some point in the day.
It Can Be More Than a Look
If you already feel overwhelmed with all of the moving parts of a wedding day, this one might not be for you. However, I have to mention how cool this moment can be. We will pick a space at your venue that has gorgeous light and private space. The next part is personal to you as a couple. I’ve had clients use this time to read each other letters, exchange gifts, deliver private/personal vows, pray together, or take creative portraits. It’s just another moment in the day carved out for the two of you. You can’t really go wrong with that.
Be Confident in Your Choice
It’s totally normal for this choice to feel intimidating. As always, please reach out (whether you are a current client or not) and ask any questions you have about this. I’m happy to listen to your thoughts and help you sort through them, or offer personalized advice about the right choice for the two of you. Head over to Instagram and hop into my DMS, I’m ready to connect!
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